My head is huge!
A Steaming Load of Shatner
A Presentation of The Big Waste of Space
Guest Book
Have a good use for the word Shatner? Have you had a bad experience with the man himself? Were you unfortunate enough to meet him, or even worse, work with him? Let us know about it!

Note: If you haven't read the original article, please do before adding to the guest book.

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Kevin Ross Vincent Friday, January 17, 2003 at 21:33:19 (PST)
Orlando, Florida U.S.A.

I have indeed been SHATNERED.But I was "lucky"(?) enough to have "Bill S." stop and talk for a moment and take a picture with me. The photo was taken by the wife of Mr.Shatner that unfortunately drowned about two years later. He's still Kirk and you can never go wrong with a little bit of...SHATNER.

Bonnie Elita Tuesday, December 31, 2002 at 01:34:56 (PST)
Napa, California USA

Uh, on top of everything else bad to say about the Big Poop Head aka Shatner....wasn't he suspected of murdering his wife a while back???

She drowned in their pool and he called 911 and the guy on the line told him to not just stand there, dive in and try to bring her to the surface.....he was wondering what to do....I guess he didn't like getting wet or something.

I always thought there was something weird about how he acted on the old Star Trek show...the way he would always deliver his lines. Where the hell did he get that technique? He's all washed up and should retire from Priceline commercials too, and why did they think he'd be good in those things, ad nauseum?? When I look at those commercials it's like he's right in the middle of being used by the company as the butt of the joke...and they kept on and on making MORE Priceline commercials for him.......sheesh, they must really be hard up for creative inspiration or something.

It's been fun and entertaining reading all of these entries. Love your website, too bad that you had that disappointing experience meeting Shatner but at least it became a great idea to build on for this site. At least my feelings about him are confirmed......Like I said before, SHATNER'S A BIG FAT POOP HEAD!!!

SpaceLad Tuesday, December 17, 2002 at 19:40:24 (PST)

A friend of mine worked for PBS in Maryland in the mid-80's where the Shatner taped some "Universe" special. He was very finicky and health conscious (demanding his herbal tea cart on set and later refusing to drink from a chalice, as called for in a script). Despite his health consciousness, he boldy went into the smoking lounge when he spied my friend and her young girlfriend puffing away. He went on and on about the supersecret plot for his upcoming ST V flick (the only one that lost money). I don't think they were impressed, either.
I later read in the local paper that his chaffeur didn't make it in one morking to take him to the taping. He hitch hiked in his jogging suit - and no one recognized him. My friend also said they also didn't recognize the short, balding "Keptan" when he arrived to the studio for makeup, much to his dismay.
I HIGHLY recommend everyone read the bio "Captain Quirk" for more goodies (like the time he lost his wig when he tripped on a rock on the ST V set. The crew members who laughed at him were prmptlyu fired!).

Pat Noyes Friday, December 06, 2002 at 23:15:17 (PST)

I'm so happy to know I'm not the only one who thinks His Highness is an obnoxious moron! If he's as wonderful as he seems to think he is, why do the rest of us not know it? What a jerk.

Rick Freeman Thursday, December 05, 2002 at 11:36:36 (PST)
Seattle, WA USA

There is a comment below about a signing at a car show. I had the exact same experience around the same time at a car show in Seattle. argh.. I don't know if anyone has posted Wil Wheatons web site but there is a great shirt that Shatners all over Bill.

Kevin Fillingim Wednesday, October 23, 2002 at 19:33:31 (PDT)
Huntsville, TX USA

I was just sitting here, reading over this site, when a new use of the word "Shatner" occured to me. Here goes:

"As soon as I leave this computer lab at school, I'm going to go home and take a nice big SHATNER."

Man, I hope I don't run out of TP.

Brian Monday, October 14, 2002 at 21:19:29 (PDT)
Hendersonville, NC US

I hear or dear sweet wonderful Capt Kirk wont be doing public appearances any more....
Golly- who will he malign? Who will he belittle?

Does anyone care?!?!?ROFL dont wanna know how much I gagged trying to type the first line.

Rick Shaw Friday, October 04, 2002 at 14:53:17 (PDT)

I had a similar autograph experience, although I didn't have to buy a book. Shatner and James Doohan were at a car show, doing autographs. I don't remember exactly when, but it was around the time of "Star Trek IV." Scotty was cool, and signed anything you brought, and had a quick chat. When we lined up to meet Shatner, we were informed by his handler that we were to walk up the steps (he was on a stage above us), walk briskly by, shake his hand, and move down the opposite steps, where we would be handed a "pre-signed" studio picture. We were told not to attempt to talk to the great man. The picture had a split Kirk/TJ Hooker thing going. This kind of treatment seems to be his M.O.

Jim Monday, September 30, 2002 at 14:09:49 (PDT)
Toronto, Canada

I wasn't working on the show, but a number of people I know were...
While in prep for one of the TekWar episodes, Shatner, an actor (and producer/director by this time) of sci-fi TV and movies for over 25 years, actually asked after a particularly long production meeting:
'Does anybody really understand bluescreen?'

Have you ever seen Mr. Bill's 'Rocket Man' from a sci-fi awards show?
The funniest thing ever put to tape.

AudreiBob Friday, September 13, 2002 at 00:07:41 (PDT)
Here, There Everywhere.

Geez Jayne, I would have told him to sod off and stick his ice tea where the sun don't shine!

What a wanker. **rollseyes**

melissa Thursday, September 12, 2002 at 22:14:22 (PDT)
new holstein, wisconsin usa

k...i go to collage and one of my proffesors is CONVINCED that William shatner (and char and dick clark) are all vampires. they feed on the blood of the young to keep themselves young!!!
and lets face it...30 years ago all three of these people looked like "crap" and now they look astounding. O_O they are blood suckers i tell afraid...very afraid.

Jayne M Thursday, September 12, 2002 at 21:04:14 (PDT)
Cedar Rapids, Iowa United States

I was unfortunate to encounter Shatner in a small Kentucky community in the mid-90's. A small, very rich, horse-breeding community called Versailles, where he kept thoroughbreds, apparently.

There was one small restaurant in the town of roughly 500 people. One bright Saturday afternoon I dropped in for the "brunch". Lo and behold, the Great Shatner was gracing a table. His reputation having preceded him, I did not say a word, but merely sat at my own table.

That afternoon I was treated to a magnificent display of "Don't You Know who I am Syndrome" by Bill, the likes of which I've never seen since. He humiliated the waitress, an endeavor he seemed to find immensely enjoyable, even more so as he reduced her to tears with such witticisms as "hurry up you fat cow", punctuated with heavy sighs and instructions to his cohorts to speak to the management and have her fired. I believe she may done something akin to bringing him iced tea with two cubes instead of four, but I can't be sure. I'm sure that whatever it was, it was a horrible experience for the Great Shatner.

Peter Pierdinock Thursday, September 12, 2002 at 15:18:44 (PDT)
Southeast, Ohio USA

'Towards thee I roll, thou all-destroying but unconquering whale; to the last I grapple with thee; from hell's heart I stab at thee; for hate's sake, I spit my last breath at thee. Sink all coffins and hearses to one common pool! and since neither can be mine, let me then tow to pieces, while still chasing thee, though tied to thee, thou Shatnered whale!

Matt Ridgway Wednesday, September 11, 2002 at 11:51:34 (PDT)

I had an identical experience with Shatner at a Convention appearance.
His hirsuit handlers shoved people through like an Austrian sausage maker!
I, however, FORCED a moment of intimacy by shoving my hand in his face and MAKING him shake it. I also used my LEFT HAND, an insult in many countries, but I figured he had his pen in his right and could use that as an excuse.
The mere act of interacting with him, as opposed to just shuffling by in a state of glazed wonder, seems to outright OFFEND his posse, so if you're gonna meet the guy, do it right. What will you miss out on by trying, they're gonna boot you out anyway and he ain't stickin around.
On a side note, I had a LOUSY experience with Adam West years ago, then a really great one just recently. I don't know how sincere he was, but he was very talkative and nice.
Stars are people too. Well, maybe not Shatner, but most!
By the way, it WAS a thrill meeting him, even if it was against his will. It's Captain Kirk for cripes sake!

Genevieve Tuesday, September 10, 2002 at 19:55:00 (PDT)
Santa Clara, CA USA

Well, I don't have a Shatner story but I thought yours was a bit of a bummer! And I didn't finish the guest book completely (I'll get back to it but my AOL just froze so I'm chancing even this much) but geesh! I'm glad I never met the guy.

Honestly though, you've gotta give him something. He's so old that he's allowed to be grumpy and obnoxious and rude, right? Well, not really, but at least that's an excuse for recent behavior. Too bad his head is too big to quite fit....

Jono Tuesday, August 13, 2002 at 13:57:07 (PDT)
Kelowna, British Columbia Canada

Hey did you know that bill's 71? He just got plastic surgery and is on the cover of the August edition of the in-flight magazine on Air Canada. Why he is, I have no idea.

Mike Friday, August 09, 2002 at 12:56:03 (PDT)
Wilmington, Delaware USA

>>Do you know Adam West claims he learned his speech patterns from William Shatner?

Hmm, and I've always been under the impression that Shatner learned *his* from Bette Davis.

"Kiiiirk. . . your ship. . . is. . . a dump."

And Captain Janeway is like Katherine Hepburn in Space, but that's another story. . .

Nicholas Robinson Wednesday, July 24, 2002 at 19:49:52 (PDT)
Montreal, Quebec Canada

>>[if things were so bad, why wasn't he at home and not hawking books at the mall?]

I agree. Although I hate to cast aspersions on anyone's "ability to marry," I think Bill might have done a bit more to be around.

If I were touring, no matter what the occasion (let alone selling books) I think I would have my wife with me.

There's no reason this web site owner should take this site down. There's plenty of propaganda out there hawking the "good" side of Captain Kirk.

andy slominski Monday, July 22, 2002 at 00:37:30 (PDT)

sorry for the confusion, but the woman in those articles I cited refer to Shatner's wife-to-be, Nerine. It was about 6 months before they were married.

Brian Wednesday, July 17, 2002 at 11:04:44 (PDT)
Hendersonville, NC US

note to th guy going on about Shatner's wife...if she was dying and all, why is he running around with other women, as in the post 2 below yours? shows how much he CARED, dont it?

Robert Litan Monday, July 15, 2002 at 14:44:53 (PDT)

Did it ever occur to you that Mr. Shatner may have been preoccupied with more serious matters when you met him on May 26, 1999?

For instance, his wife was dying of severe alcoholism at the time and would ultimately pass away about two months later. I'd guess that most people might not be very gregarious in such trying circumstances.

Mr Shatner may be all you say he is and more. However, if you want to be seen as someone who is above being petty and vindictive, I'd suggest the possibility of taking down this website.

[Then he should have canceled the appearance, simple as that. Or as a professional, at least left his personal problems at home. I was going to leave the situation with his wife out of it, but since you bring it up if things were so bad, why wasn't he at home and not hawking books at the mall?]

michael Sunday, July 14, 2002 at 04:59:00 (PDT)
dublin, ireland

one day a friend put on shatners album. Nuff said.

andy slominski Saturday, July 13, 2002 at 12:00:55 (PDT)

This entry was combined from a couple articles written by Ron Mckay in the newspaper Scotland on Sunday in the mid 1990's.

William Shatner - aka Captain James Tiberius Kirk of the USS Enterprise - duly beamed down to tape an appearance on the forthcoming Channel 4 sci-fi game show Space Cadets. Shatner is a big fishing fan, but sad to report he caught nothing on his forays on to the water from the Cameron House Hotel, Loch Lomond. Fortunately, he had brought his girlfriend with him, presumably to make up for not having pulled anything. She accompanied him to the recording of the show in Glasgow two weeks ago.

In a break in the filming, while compere Greg Proops put on his panstick or something, Shatner and his lady disappeared.

Had they nipped into a matter transporter and slipped through the heavens? Well, almost. Two women employees popped into the ladies room and were stunned to find Shatner and friend in a cubicle transporting themselves in a thoroughly un-Trekkie like way. Shatner and his squeeze blushed, apologised, adjusted their clothing and left.

One of the two women wrote this ode especially for Shatner:

Dear William Shatner, shame on you, Up to naughty things in the ladies' loo.

BBC Scotland will never seem the same Since you beamed down with your latest flame.

In true James Kirk fashion you seized the chance, To corner the woman and whip off your pants.

Your little liaison was no doubt divine, Though you must have reached climax at warp factor nine! As J & I arrived when you were all a-fluster A simple "sorry ladies" was all you could muster.

Not even USS Enterprise could achieve the speed of light But that's the speed at which you left the ladies' loo that night! I hope you weren't embarrassed by our unexpected stop The expression on your face was truly one of shock! Were you thinking "beam me up Scotty" or "beam me up Spock"? There'd never been a time till now when James Kirk couldn't talk! As for J & I, we'd like to thank you, for the right To tell this little story 'cos it really made our night Let's hope we meet again some day, ven in the ladies' loo! It was wonderful for us, but how was it for you?

KnightHawk Monday, July 08, 2002 at 18:29:52 (PDT)

Have a good day, eh?
I just want to say that Shatner is giving Canadians a bad name, and me, being Canadian, am truly offended! Speaking as a TRUE Canadian, I would like to personally apologize for his UN-Canadian-like attitude. Not only that... he owes me money! In 1978, I exorcised his Toronto (Ontario, Canada) home and was promised a substantial sum. He failed to pay! (Fargen Bastage!) I'm currently trying to "RE-Possess" his home. Volunteers are welcome. We'll meet this halloween!

Karen Monday, July 08, 2002 at 00:38:27 (PDT)
San Diego, CA USA

Here are a couple of encounters with Captain Jerk...First, my close friend was working at Magic Mtn. amusement park in CA during a filming of TJ Hooker. When she walked by the crew she saw Mr. Ego doing leglifts on the grass in his underwear (and of course his toupee) in full view of anyone wandering by.

Second, in 1990, I called in to a radio talk show he was a guest on (pluggin a Tekwars book, I think). After telling him I never had really been a big Trek fan, I told him that I had a copy of his album "The Transformed Man." There was total dead air. I had rendered him speechless (he hadn't been doing Priceline commercials yet) I imagine he was afraid I was going to raz him (which I was VERY tempted to do). I wimped out and had pity on him and told him that I REALLY liked it a LOT and wondered if he would be doing any more albums. You could imagine the excitement on his face as his voice got amimated and excited about how much he had enjoyed working on that album and he went on and on about it!! I asked him if there was any way I could get his autograph on it and he said he was certain that he could do it somehow...and then the host cut our conversation off. SO...when the next Star Trek convention came to town I suffered through the entire thing with my album in hand (remember I am NOT a fan, other than to laugh) until the Captain came on stage to talk and field questions. Since he had told me he would sign it when we spoke on the radio, I thought this would be the best time to approach him (I planned to remind him in front of the whole crowd that he had said he would do it and then tell him that he couldn't break his word). SO when he was taking questions from the audience I kept standing up and waving the album to get his attention. I KNOW he saw me, but he never chose me, even when I was one of the only ones left with a "question."

I like to think that I scared him...but sadly I may have been one of the catalysts that helped the Priceline campaign get going. I DID tell him that I REALLY liked the album, and I think it inflated his ego (if that's possible for it to get any further inflated) and he thought I was speaking for masses of silent Shatner singing fans.

All I have to say to him now is, "Hey....MR. TAMBOURINE MAAAAAAN!! What in the world could you have been thinking when you made that recording???"

Nicholas Robinson Thursday, June 27, 2002 at 15:07:54 (PDT)
Montreal, Quebec Canada

Concerning the story about Bill's gay one-night stand:

Ron Asheton, the gutarist for punk rocker Iggy Pop, claims that, in the summer of 1975, Shatner made a pass at him in an L.A. bar.

Shatner supposedly approached him in the Hyatt House pub. "He wanted me to sit down, then he got kind of grabby," Ashton claims.

Horrified that Captain Kirk might be anything less than straight, he fled the scene. "Probably if I'd been drinking I would have sat down just for the weirdness of seeing what would happen," Asheton says.

(From "The Encyclopedia Shatnerica" by Robert E. Schnakenberg

Ed Tuesday, June 18, 2002 at 09:32:31 (PDT)

Thank you for posting my unintelligible entry. It had no website to plug and I take it you deemed it relevant to your story. I should've checked the spelling before submitting it. And proofreas it further, I guess.
Do you know Adam West claims he learned his speech patterns from William Shatner?

John Watson  John66 Sunday, June 16, 2002 at 11:59:55 (PDT)
Nokomis, Florida USA

Once I saw him at the airport and I walked up to him while he was sitting there waiting for his plane. I stood there with a book that I let every one sign. I put by him and he looked up at me got up and pushed me away and walked to the Starbucks nearby. So because of that experience I thought up a little saying.... Ugggh..oooooh..splurt... I got A whole Bunch of Shatner on the toilet...gross.

Brian Thursday, June 13, 2002 at 00:24:29 (PDT)

I was at a con where he showed up. now at that time, me and some friends were doing cable access comedy on a local channel. first off- I got stuck with door monitor duty. whoopie. I hadda let WillHam Shatner in. wasnt told any details, and tried to derail about 30 people advancing with autograph pens and stuff to be signed. I didnt know they had PAID to do that...?! Second- after I was duly informed otherwise, I just let them do their thing, and opened the door for him to to go onstage. I said simply- "Good afternoon, sir." He gave me look that woulda wilted the cannon of an Abrams tank. He did his thing, and acted like someone turned on a switch. Got off stage, and went to Constipated Grump mode. me and a buddy wanted to go get dual distruptors and "escort him out", with the things to his back. mwahaha. And wanna know something? I had more people telling me they were FANS of MY work (on the cable show) than ol' Shatty boy! *G* All I could do was smile, nod, and SWEAT. Honestly, it kinda freaked me out. But I was still gracious, if not so stupified and shocked it about knocked me over.

Shatner, I am a better actor, both on AND off stage, so NYAH!

Leon Chamberlain Sunday, June 02, 2002 at 18:29:25 (PDT)
Payson, AZ USA

Did you know that in the old days shat was the past tense of shit? Many old poems have the line "he shat upon the floor" or similar. That's the honest truth.

[What kind of poetry do you read, anyway?]

Ed Friday, May 31, 2002 at 03:04:39 (PDT)
Orange, NJ USA

How deleting your own pathetic story? Every trekkie knows What actors ar friends of the fans and their level of interest in interacting with the fandom. Make plans to attend a convention some day. You will collect so much more material for new websites. And consider yourself lucky. Shatner charges over a $100 for his autograph independently of which book of his you buy. Trek fans are a resilient breed. We are not easily screwed by any actor who had ever milked from Trek. You asked to be Shatnered. Treasured your signed copy and read more of it.

[Is my universal translator on the fritz? Anyone else catch that?]

Thomas Boone Wednesday, May 29, 2002 at 12:02:33 (PDT)
Winston-Salem, North Carolina USA

I was producing a silent auction for a children's charity and got a hold of Walter Koenigs email address from a friend to ask for an autographed photo. She said that he was very friendly and would gladly help us out. Well, he answered the first email with an enthusiastic OK and asked me to send him an official request on our letterhead. This I did, of course. Then.....nothing. For well over two months I waited. Then I sent him another email, to which he replied "Who are you and what do you want?" I, once again explained everything and he acknowledged that he remembered us. Here's the kicker: When I asked him once again if he would honor his word and send us something, he responded "did I say I would....?" What the hell is that??? Mr. Jerkov, your career is beaming up.

aijjia blue Monday, May 27, 2002 at 01:59:05 (PDT)
eureka, ca usa

howdy! i had 2 tell u i just about died when i read that whoile ting on shatner, cause my friends and i here in humboldt have been using his name as a total cutdown for almost a year. as in your such a fukking shatner!!!! but let me tell you how it all began.............
my friend and i were tryin to hitch a ride north from this great festival down in laytonville called hogg farm an we finally got on at like 10:30 at night from this guy who spent the entire 3 hour ride blaring atrocious surfer rock (i dig surfer rock ok, but this shit was just shatnerific!). but get this. the name of the band was the shatners. seriously!!!! its just to scary to make up on my own. so ever since then if someone hella sukks, you just gotta let 'em know, man, your such a fukkin shatner!

Mike T Wednesday, May 15, 2002 at 12:26:54 (PDT)
Troy, OH U.S.A.

This site cracked me up. I have zero interest in Shatner and Star Trek. I DO have the 'Golden Throats' CDs however and Shatner's 'singing' can always brighten a dreary day due to it's awful Shatnerianinity.

I work with some of the biggest SciFi/comic books geeks I've ever known. 40+ year old men with more nerdy zest for fantasy that that of teenaged pimplefaced virgin D & Ders. I was uncontrollably compelled to share the nega-Shatner story with them. I received a deafening glare from each one after they read it. Ha! I REALLY hate SciFi nerds. They can cram it up their Shatners!!

Eric Daigle Tuesday, May 14, 2002 at 09:58:53 (PDT)
Boston, Massachusetts United States Of America

I loved your Shatner story. I just came across this web site and read your encounter. Your killing me. I'm here at work and laughing out loud in reqards to your experince and your comments about Mr.Bill.
Great Web site and I hope I see Bill in the streets so I can beat the Shatner out of him.

Judi Hartsburg Monday, May 13, 2002 at 13:11:26 (PDT)
Sandborn, IN USA

I always liked the original Star Trek series, and thought James T. could never be topped as Captain. That was UNTIL....I got a brain, no... UNTIL....those damn Priceline commercials. Even black and white filming could not mask Shatner's thinly veiled ego. I found his performance repulsive and particularly Un-Funny. Apparently HE is the only one who thought he was amusing (and/or talented). I read somewhere that he always slept in his chair in-between takes while shooting the commercials; and was rude to everyone on the set. (If I read it, it MUST be true, right????) It got so bad that I became physically ill everytime a Priceline commercial began, and had to either vomit or change the station!!! I could not care less if Shatner got a life -- it would just be nice if the old fart got a personality.

James T. Kirk Tuesday, May 07, 2002 at 18:17:29 (PDT)
City On The Edge of Forever,

"You fools...all of you!! Don't you realise what you're doing???'re about to - destroy your entire....CIVILISATION!! Look around you....see what you've BECOME!! Is this what your God taught you to be??...SAVAGES???....MURDERERS???...I BEG you people to - stop this...madness!!!"

David Jackson Saturday, April 27, 2002 at 19:23:44 (PDT)
Houston, Texas United States

Hi all. I actually do have a Shatner story as well as a Nimoy story I would like to relate. I met both of them in a public appearence they did (at different times though at the same location) and here is what I remember of it.

It was in the early to mid 1970's at a Toys R Us store. I was a kid of around 12 years old then and this was prior to the Motion Picture being made. I remember being absolutely nuts about the MEGO Star Trek figures and I'm just guessing that this was the tie-in for this appearence. I have no idea why they were there but it was well publicized. My dad took myself and my little brother to go see Shatner first. The line was about a mile long and moved very slowly. We waited, advanced a couple of steps, waited, advanced a couple more get the idea.

When we finally got up to Mr Shatner he was polite amd even friendly. he shook all of our hands and I remember telling him somethin stupid like "I really like Star Trek" and got a "Thank you very much" from him. he even told my dad "Thank you for coming out".

In short I had no complaints whatsoever. A week or two later we came back to meet Leanord Nimoy at the same Toy store and this time , again there was a line a mile long. The line on this day moved very quickly and we literally were moved past a stoic Nimoy at a range of about ten feet away. Not a word, not a smile, not even a hint of recognition for our time.

I remember my dad being much more annoyed on the second trip home though at 12 years old I really didn't put a lot of thought into it. hey, I had SEEN him so that was fine by me. Later, after getting a little older and reading many of the Shatner stories that appeared from time to time as well as learning about Mr Nimoy's uneasy relationship with his most famous character I decided to not take either experience meeting them too seriously.

Later in fact I had a chance at a convention to meet James Doohan and this was the best of the three. Mr Doohan was a blast and probably spent 10 minutes talking with us and seemed genuinely happy to meet fans of his work. Of course you aren't going to find many websites out there advocating turning the word "Doohan" into a profanity. He's known for being friendly and gracious in public.

Sorry to hear that your meeting with him went so poorly. It sucks and it's a shame but it happens.

Big Pauly Schwinghammer Monday, April 22, 2002 at 17:04:45 (PDT)
Dublin , Ireland

While far from being a Trekkie - and I have no interest whatsoever in the second series (all I know is that every time I happen to stumble upon it on the telly it features that chap Riker sporting a Klingon-type forehead) - I have always been a huge fan of the original cult 60s show, for it represents (unlike The Next Generation) a triumph of imagination and vision over budgetary limitations, with the perfect mixture of thematic depth, strong characterisation, pathos, amusing karate-style fighting and cheesy humour.
And as paunchy, multi-faceted babe-magnet Jimbo, Shatner has undeniable charisma. His acting can be hammy at times, but only in a way that complements the charm of the show. So in that sense I've always had a lot of time for ol' Shatno.
Living in a small corner of Ireland, I've never had any encounters with the guy, but from all I've read, heard or seen of him it is obvious that he is as mad as a mongoose - his musical adventures alone bear testimony to that (mind, some of Leonard Nimoy's toons are actually pretty cool).
But the story by the fellow who alleges that he had a one-night stand with the Captain of the USS Enterprise reminds me of an anecdote I read in a British magazine (Private Eye) years ago concerning an appearance by the actor on a popular British live TV chat show (Clive James). Shatner informed his host that he was au fait with a particular archaic language (Yiddish or somesuch), and uttered a sentence in the language. When asked to reveal what the sentence meant he merely smiled enigmatically, and the conversation moved on. After the show it emerged that a shocked native speaker of the language in question had called the station to complain. What Wild Bill had said translated roughly as "Your dick in my ass". Shatnered!
So perhaps that mystery prankster who many years ago famously painted on a prominent wall in my old home town, in two-foot high letters, the legend "TJ HOOKER IS GAY" knew something that the rest of us were blissfully unaware of......

Swingin' Shatner eh? Who'd-a thought it??

crazy lorna  greatgreatgreat@bolt,com Sunday, April 21, 2002 at 13:06:23 (PDT)
dublin, what? ireland

what happpened when captain kirk was standing over his wife and he had a bowel movement?

he shat 'n 'er

LParker  worbs48117 Saturday, April 13, 2002 at 13:55:37 (PDT)
monroe, michigan USA

U gotta be Shatin' me!

L.A.M. Thursday, April 11, 2002 at 12:15:40 (PDT)

Now, I've never met the man, but last year I was attending a Sci-fi/Anime convention and he was a guest. He was scheduled to give a presentation of some sort and wanted over $100 for a seat and an autograph.
I spent my time more wisely opting to spend time with some new friends I had just made and to hang around voice actor extordinare Scott McNeil. I haven't met many celebrities but Mr. McNeil has to be one of the nicest out there! He began with a pannel discussion where fans could ask questions and share their enthousiasm and then headed to another room for an autograph signing. (During the pannel various snipits of a Star Trek presentation kept interuipting from the enxt room) It was quite interesting to hear a great scream/cheer when a voice came over the speakers to announce that "Mr. Shatner has left the building"

sarah Friday, April 05, 2002 at 14:52:29 (PST)

i have no shatner story, and i hope i never do. but i've read some of the autobiographies of some of the other original trek actors, and i can't say i've found anything about him that would make me like him. this just reinforces it.

whether he likes it or not, he will always be known for captain kirk.

my computer is a piece of shatner. i had to shut it down twice while reading this story.

Mr_Fizz Sunday, March 31, 2002 at 08:36:25 (PST)

This food looks like a pile of shatner

D. Schulz Wednesday, February 06, 2002 at 14:53:19 (PST)

No story, just a few comments. I may be mistaken, but I don't think he did any of his own "Captain Kirk" stunts. Maybe that is why he looks like an out of shape piece of Shatner. As OLD GUYS go I'd "do" Sean Connery before I even had a drink with Mr. Bill.
Maybe he' such an ass because he's not or never has gotten much.

Sue Sandys Sunday, January 20, 2002 at 15:11:19 (PST)

Sorry to go against the trend, but ages ago, when he was publicising the first movie, I waited for an autograph before he did a chat show for the BBC.It was raining, he was late for the show and the BBc guys were hassling him to hurry up. I had a camera round my neck and he asked if I'd like a picture, of course I was delighted. He sked one of the BBC guys who was not best pleased and who apparently had never used a simple Kodak automatic as it took him 3 times to get it right. He was totally charming and I would hate to think he'd changed so much.

Ben McClelland Tuesday, December 11, 2001 at 19:16:08 (PST)
United Kingdom

Was very interested by your experience meeting Bill Shatner. One of my mother's friends, who is from Canada, told me that she used to work in a coffee shop often frequented by Bill in his early "acting" days, before Star Trek. I can't remember exactly what she said, but the basic jist of it was that he was very unfriendly and incredibly big headed. That story, along with this site and its guestbook, are just drops in the ocean of tales of Shatner's generally unpleasant attitude. I know a lot of actors, and whilst there may be a certain amount of post-accidental-fan-meeting groaning, it is generally with good humour, and they are always pleased to meet fans. Finally, I went to a book-signing by Majel Barret Roddenberry years ago, and, whilst meeting her was a necessarily brief experience (there were HUNDREDS of people there), she was nevertheless very pleasant. Considering the awful jobs some people have to do, occasionally being recognised by people who think you are wonderful doesn't sound that bad.

deena Tuesday, October 16, 2001 at 05:36:39 (PDT)

I think a lot of celebrities get jaded and weary of people always trying to 'use' them. When they meet too many people with a hidden agenda they just get suspicious of the public. They never promised to be anyone's buddy or pal just because they are working in a public forum. So the guy is distant, big whoop! I think a secret jealousy is at the heart of people who over-react to the coolness of some celebrities. If you want a warm fuzzy pal, get a dog, not an autograph.

[Denna, my point was that he was making a public appearance for the express purpose of meeting his fans and signing autographs, during which he was extremely impersonal and rude. We didn't go up to him in a restaurant or a bathroom a point I made in the article he was at a publicized meet-and-greet and completely ignored the fans who were invited there by him and his agents. We were in no way using him. In fact, he was using us, seeing as he was getting paid for the appearance and was making book sales on top of it, yet showed not one bit of common friendliness.

I have met many celebrities in different situations and they have all, for the exception of Shatner, have at the very least offered a smile and a nod. And they weren't getting paid to meet me.]

Pat Evans Sunday, August 26, 2001 at 01:10:18 (PDT)

I don't have a Shatner story, however a co-worker of mine,who is a huge Star Trek: TNG fan, waited on Patrick Stewart in our shop. He was very amicable. As it turned out, my associate ended up going out to Stewart's house to do an in home estimate and then installing an entertainment system for him. He was beside himself that he had Capt. Picard's phone # in his cellphone. He had to restrain himself from calling Mr. Stewart and checking up on it every other day. One day he swung by again to make sure everything was working. Patrick Stewart opens the door, looks my friend in the eye and says (with his trademark delivery)...

"I do believe you've gone beyond the call of duty."

Needless to say, my buddy Shatnered his pants.
Not a Shatner story, just an affirmation of how a Starfleet officer should conduct himself.

Jason Duncan Wednesday, August 15, 2001 at 11:11:38 (PDT)
Halifax, Nova Scotia Canada

During the filming of one of the TekWar movies (they were made-for-tv movies, I think) I had the occasion of meeting Mr. Shatner in person. He and another, younger man (an assistant, perhaps. He was wearing a TekWar jacket, so that is how I am guessing that the two were involved in the filming of TekWar) ate lunch at Kenny Roger's Roast, the restaurant I worked at.

Kenny Roger's Roast, as some of you must know, is kind of like Don Cherry's restaurant - mediocre food carried by a famous person's face. Maybe that is why Shatner wanted to eat there. It reminded him of L.A. somehow.

The two seated themselves and I approached their table. "Ahh, Mr. Shatner. My name is Jason and it will be my pleasure to serve you this afternoon," I said. The two men took their menus. Bill smiled politely, while the assistant TekWar man never looked at my face. I left them alone and they conversed about whatever and made their decisions.

They both ordered the grilled chicken breast with mashed potatoes. (I suspect after seeing the menu, Bill regretted his decision to eat at Kenny Roger's.) I told the kitchen staff who it was that was going to eat the chicken. After peeking out the door at Shatner's table, one of the staff (we'll call him Maurice, for privacy's sake) became enraged at the fact that Bill Shatner was in the house.

Apparently, Maurice's mother had been in a traffic accident with Shatner in faraway Montreal. After some legal wrangling, Bill escaped the accident scot-free while Maurice's mother was left with the insurance costs and a broken wrist.

Maurice quickly developed a plan for revenge on Shatner, (who he called "the Slippery Bastard"). Maurice took aside two servings of mashed potatoes and put them on the floor. He then undid his pants and began to urinate into the potatoes!

I was incredulous! and a little worried about what was going on here. I did not want to field complaints from Shatner (who, according to accounts from ET, was a cranky man in the best of times).

The chicken and potatoes, along with a healthy glob of butter, some chives and pepper, and the contents of Maurice's bladder, were delivered to Shatner's table.

I do not know if the two men tasted urine in their food, but there were no complaints from them concerning the meal. Shatner and assistant drank water and ate no dessert. They left within 15 minutes of being served. $40 cdn was left on the table to pay for the meal (which came to something like $38) and a (two dollar) tip.

This story isn't about something bad that Shatner did to me - he and his assistant were polite (if anything - a little phony). This story is about the hatred of Shatner that exists in the world. Enjoy your afternoon,


NYCJohn Thursday, July 26, 2001 at 09:25:26 (PDT)

Wow! What a stroke of luck to find your web-site! (True Story) I was just about to cancel a trip to Vegas with my girlfriend and her family so I could attend a convention with the sole purpose of getting Shatner's autograph. Clearly this site has helped me realize that I'm not missing ANYTHING by not meeting that load of Shatner. Keep up the good work!

Duke Boling Monday, July 09, 2001 at 19:08:58 (PDT)
Tampa, FL USA

Great story, sorry about your experience with the great Captain Kirk. What a total piece of Shatner. From what I hear a lot of movie stars are like that. If Shatner was hurting for money you would of probably have a different experience at the book signing. Oh well that's how the world works now a days. It's a big Shatner sandwhich and everybody's got to take a bite. Well good luck to you, and try to not to step in any Shatner.

jimmy t Tuesday, June 26, 2001 at 18:39:10 (PDT)

i have never actually met that @$$Hole i have seen him at an airport screeming at an attendant.
the trip wasn't totaly worthless, i did meet "Weird Al" Yankovic.
(P.S. i did hawk a lugie onto Shitners wig,he didn't notice)

Fredo Sunday, June 10, 2001 at 18:01:43 (PDT)
utica, MI USA

My! I just ripped a Shatner!

A sulfur-like gas
Escaped from my ass

Lordy, what a Shatner!

James diGriz Saturday, May 19, 2001 at 23:01:53 (PDT)
Melbourne, FL USA

I was able to meet Shatner away from any publicity. He is an absolute hoot. This was at a small diner, people nice and friendly. He was talking with everyone nicely, until some obvious touristy type came in, and said "Hey, it's Captain Kirk!"

You could hear a pin drop for almost 30 seconds at this point. He left a 20 for the waitress not bothering to finish his meal, said "good day gentlemen" and walked out. The person who said this got looks from everyone there as if they were about to hang him in the town square.

The next morning Bill was back, almost like nothing ever happened. As I left the diner, he walked out a few moments later. I got the courage to ask him in my most sincere voice what happened. he said that he doesn't mind being well known, but he did other things aside from that role.

He went on about not likeing the entire franchise, and that trekkies piss him off. I almost understood how he felt, but I remembered meeting the late Warner Klemperer and how he has always embraced the character he is most famous for.

Warner always took time from appearances to talk to people who asked him about Klink. He said that it was a role that defined him, and is grateful people watch Hogan's Heroes after all these years. Even back stage on broadway he talked about Klink, even after 30 years since the show started. He has portrayed Klink many times outside of HH, Including a Batman(1966) episode, cameos in films, and on the Simpsons.

I compared the two. One played a Nazi in Germany during WWII, something considered a vile act in itself. He was the villian although a buffoon, yet the man loved the character he played, and often did lines the character would say to make people laugh. The other played a Captain, a hero to everyone. Yet he abhorred the part after it was over.

I will miss Warner, he did a lot for broadway and television. I have his signature on my mantle, and shall look at it in reverence to him. Shatner refused my simple request, and I shall dance when he reaches the great beyond.

Draw your own conclusions folks, but I think the "Nazi" has more class.

R Mason Monday, May 07, 2001 at 11:55:24 (EDT)
Los Angeles, CA

I know this will come as a shock to many people, but I'm going to let out a secret that I've been harboring for many years. Back in the late 1970s, I was a close friend of Bill (actually a friend of a friend, but we were together quite a bit). Bill, my friend and I did quite a bit of miscelaneous drugs together, mostly cocaine. One night we had been up for a few days when Bill suggested that we try something different. We proceeded to have sex together (yes... homosexual sex). Shatner claimed this was something he'd never done, but by the way he went at, it I rather doubt it. It only happened that night, but the truth of the situation remains: I was William Shatner's homosexual lover for one night. By the way, R. Mason is an alias, so don't bother going to the press with this if you intend for me to come forward. Monday, April 23, 2001 at 21:20:27 (EDT)
Plainfield, IN, Usa

Not surprising and I don't doubt it a bit!!
I have heard several comments by the "crew" and they mostly hated him. Sulu was one that really came out and made several comments.
Always enjoyed the shows and the movies but agree he is pretty much of a jerk and I am glad we have a new cast in The Next Generation!!

Daryl Hamlin Sunday, March 25, 2001 at 10:18:48 (EST)
Minneapolis, MN USA

The story you are about to read is entirely baseless, with no positive evidence supporting the facts on which it would not be based. The message however is very real, and anyone interested in William/Bill Shatner lore should get it and think deeply.

First of all, I never met Bill Shatner. I went to California once and saw the Officers of the Starship Enterprise stick their hands in the cement at Mann's Chinese Theater. But I couldn't get close enough to meet them. Ooohh I was so mad at those insensitive bastards!! Barricades up and security all around. The nerve!

If I had met Bill, I would have said "Bill, good to meet you." He would apparently, according to the posts I have read, said [nothing]. Or, "Get away from me kid." Or, more likely, "call me 'Mr. Shatner.'"

I was on an airplane once, and Billy was not there. There was, however, someone in first class who was quite an asshole. He was complaining about the service and glared at anyone who came up to use the first-class facilities. I thought to myself "Maybe this is B-bo Shatner's brother?"

Well, I guess you can see my point. If you are ever around anyone who is rude, arrogant, or a class-A-hole, then you have probably experienced something like you might experience around Wild Bill Shatner. And that is a lesson from which we can all learn.

Bomsa Damgard Saturday, March 24, 2001 at 09:29:31 (EST)
Kashmir India

In 1993, while bathing in the Ganges, I noticed a crumpled ungulate at the water's edge. I approached to find a dying wildebeest, bleeding from its....ummmm...nether region. That was only the first such occurrence, and over the next two weeks a total of 17 of these poor animals were discovered in much the same condition. It puzzled local authorities for a while, but eventually a small newspaper reported that William Shatner had been around during that time, for the filming of a "GOT MILK?" commercial. It was reported that he was staying in a nearby hotel, and liked to take walks by the river. Draw your own conclusions....

Todd Adamson Saturday, March 24, 2001 at 09:07:22 (EST)

Sounds like you've been raped and shatnerized.

Ellen Ripley Tuesday, February 06, 2001 at 02:19:26 (EST)
Reston, Virginia USA

This is why I love my grandmother:
My father went to Hollywood to become an actor. He got only so far in the early 70's being a single father with 3 children. He did get some work and did work with Shatner. My grandmother during this time ran into him at the Bonaventure (sp?) Hotel. She went up to him to say hello and that she had spoken to him over the phone and that she was happy that her son had met someone who was helpful and not the typical sleeze ball in L.A. (he apparently could act when his ego needed stroking) - she waited until he finished eating and then when the waiter took his check and Shatner was just sitting there, Grandma walked over and before she could finish the line "hello Mr. Shatner you know my son...." he looked at her, sighed heavily and said, "look lady - I am NOT in the mood to sign autographs so please, just leave my table". My grandmother fixed her with his eye and said, "Well ASSHOLE I didn't want your stinking autograph my son Glenn told me to tell you hello!" At that he tried to apologize and my grandmother just said 'sit on it' and walked off. Go Grandma!

Roger G. Sunday, January 07, 2001 at 18:02:18 (EST)
Sacramento, CA

Way back in 1974 I was a contestant on a game show (Blankety Blanks) and Shatner was the celebrity on the other team. He was reasonably friendly, and even autographed an empty box of Promise Margarine, for which he was a pitchman. At the time, he was starring in a flop series "Barbary Coast" and had not reached his pinnacle of arrogant stardom.

LongLake C.C. Saturday, December 30, 2000 at 01:06:12 (EST)
Portage, WI USA

We here at the clubhouse find it disturbing that William Shatner actually believes he is a talented entertainer. We have recently adopted a modified comeback in honor of him; "Shatner Happens"!

Lisa Saturday, December 23, 2000 at 18:08:56 (EST)
Balto., MD USA

I have cramps and the stores were packed when I went shopping today, AND I forgot to buy a magazine I wanted. Today was a real Shatner.

Charlemange Saturday, December 23, 2000 at 17:05:10 (EST)
Washington DC, USA

LMAO at this, it was too funny!

Savior Friday, December 15, 2000 at 15:01:43 (EST)
st pete beach, fl. usa

I would have signed this earlier, but I had to take a SHATNER.

ROBERT SHEPPARD Wednesday, December 06, 2000 at 21:23:24 (EST)

In response to a great "shatner" slam........
"Boy, what a Shatner!"

Lori Wednesday, November 22, 2000 at 21:40:05 (EST)

I have never cared for Shartner, and I can see why now. Too bad he had been so rude to the folks who came out to see him.
He sure isn't Don Knotts, is he?

Great site.

Babbilla Saturday, November 18, 2000 at 07:32:03 (EST)

Great site.Keep it up. Fascinating!

Carol Davis  jingleybell Wednesday, November 01, 2000 at 19:49:43 (EST)
Warrenton, VA usa

I haven't ever met Shatner, thank goodness, but I met Patrick Stewart in Dulles Airport about two years ago and he was very polite. We talked as we made our way through the concourse and he actually apologized when he had to cut off the conversation to get to his plane. Overall, it was a lovely experience and I guess that makes two nice Starfleet officers and one steaming piece of Shatner.

Maybe they learned from the first one....

Chad Sunday, October 15, 2000 at 15:36:40 (EDT)
Warrensburg, Missouri USA

I have always believed that Shatner is an arrogant prick with little or no acting and singing commercials anybody? He also managed to render both Lucy In The Sky With Diamonds and Mr. Tambourine Man unlistenable. Anyways, I didn't meet Shatner but my parents did, when he was filming a movie with Sandra Bullock and Michael Caine, called "Miss Congeniality", at the alamo. While Bullock chit-chatted a little during takes with my parents, Shatner refused to talk to anyone or to even have his picture taken.

Mike Saturday, October 14, 2000 at 01:58:39 (EDT)
Wheaton, Il USA

Many years ago, I was employed by the National Safety Council, who produce safety training materials for American businesses and the public-at-large.

Shatner was hired to narrate a series of videos, and let me tell you that even all these years later, the tales surrounding the filming of these videos are still passed around like boogyman tales around a campfire.

Few people were allowed to talk to him, those that did had to address him as "Mr. Shatner" and apparently with the kind of reverence normally afforded only to kings, popes and former members of the Beatles.

He treated most everyone with what was described as "disdain" and seemed to want to rush through to get the filming over with as quickly as possible. Of course, this was greeted with some relief by the crew, because I'm told that they wanted to spend as little time as possible with Mr. Shatner.

It is no surprise to me that so many people, like yourself, have had bad experiences with the man. It is fairly well known that even the cast of the Star Trek series wasn't too fond of him either.

As James T. Kirk, he may have boldly gone where no man has gone before, but as a human being there are two places he SHOULD have gone, namely 1) Acting classes and 2) charm school.

Wesley Treat Saturday, October 14, 2000 at 01:50:29 (EDT)
The Big Waste of Space

Got a Shatner story of your own? Please add it to the guest book!

Guest book courtesy of Matt's Script Archive.

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